The Anti-Gospel of Jesus Christ

by Miko Bartek

Early Sunday morning I got up to go back to Saint Bartholomew, the church where my journey began. I dressed in front of a mirror. Black shirt. Black trousers. Black socks. And black shoes. I was thinking about the comedy act and the hypnosis from the previous evening. My mind still felt powerfully focused after a full night’s sleep. Impervious to distraction.

On the drive to church the world seemed imbued with fresh energy. Everything appeared so vivid. I was noticing things that my mind would usually not even see. I arrived at church with an hour to prepare for the first mass of the day. May in northern Ohio. The morning was chilly. The day promised to be warm. Monsignor Gregory led the service. When he heard that I wanted to come to this mass, he roped me in as a co-celebrant. During the service, I sat next to him, at the base of the altar off to the left side, from the pew point-of-view. Standing when Father Gregory stood, and sitting when he also sat. Except for the reading of the gospel, and his homily.

After the gospel, the monsignor launched into a homily on the question of where should Catholics place their trust. In science or in the church? I was sitting beside the altar, listening intently to his every word, thinking about what he was saying. It was all making sense until he came to his conclusion, which was that we should trust both institutions, but for different reasons. Science should be trusted because it is based on evidence and reason, and because it is the best way we have to establishing truth in this world. But the church should be equally trusted, he said, because the church is based on tradition and divine guidance.

When I heard that, a thousand things happened in my mind seemingly at once. This was instantly followed by a realization that felt as though it was helped along by God Itself. Or by an angel of God. Suddenly I found myself marveling at a simple, yet irrefutable argument. A logical proof of sorts. I didn’t think this up. It came to me in an eye blink, as though some invisible intelligence had just dropped a package at the entrance to my mind. I was stunned. Salvation through Christ is logically impossible. I could not find a flaw in the argument. I also didn’t want to believe it. What was I to do with such a realization? I loved Jesus. This disturbed me greatly.